What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

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Why is the black guy bad a Hockey? He was raped with a hockey stick by his father, after many years of pain and sex jokes, and the internet meme of the rapey daddy came out, the man then tryed to kill him self, but lived and the became a... shit i forgot, well long story short, it was roger from family guy.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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I just found out i have cancer.

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what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

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why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

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When life throws you lemons, duck cuz they freakin' hurt

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what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

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How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

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Hitler, Goebbels and Göring walked into a bar. They ordered 3 steins and took their seats in quiet corner of the establishment. After short deliberation they were ready to start work on building a highway that would be the envy of the world.

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

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Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

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What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

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Where does someone who has lost his arm, has a bleeding head, is mentally ill, has strep throat, and lung cancer go? Too late, they died.

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What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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Why is it sad that a black guy died in a car crash He was my friend

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How are cars made? By magic.

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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