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Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

Black people

Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

Some peoples attempts at being funny on this website are the stupidest things i have ever read.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he does it the same way everybody else does.

An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

What did the man without a tongue say...

A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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