Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

Why don't you play uno with Mexicans? Because they collect all the green cards.

Whats worse than 2 holocausts? 2 and one tenth of a holocaust

What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

poop nuff said

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

What's yellow, long, hard, and moves up and down? A banana in an elevator...

what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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