elen degeneres is straight....

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

A horse walks into a barn.

There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

There was an american man on the way to work.

Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. I'm not sure, because there are many farmers on this earth, and finding the same one that you are talking about, may be hard. It may take a while, but i'll get back to you as soon as possible, with an anwser.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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