What's black and white and red all over? Two biracial gay guys boning a can of paint...

What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

What's the difference between a hippopotamus? An orangutan.

Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

The homeless man first experience warmth....in Hell

What comes after 23? 24.

What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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