What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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An Asian walks into a bar, but the bartender asks him to leave the bartender replies "we're closing soon" but he secretly harbored racist views that he had not yet come to terms with and was deeply ashamed of.

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shut up iggy

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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Do you believe this will change?

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Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

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Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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What's good? Anything that is not bad.

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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Knock Knock whose there? ach ach who? bless you

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops