Why did the boy drop the ice cream? So that it would melt and he could dip his dick into it and his mom could lick it off.

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your going to die

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I can't wait to eat this bagel! Yes you can. Yeah, I guess you're right.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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Why did little Betsy have a stomach ache? Her alcoholic mother pinned her down in a drunken rage and made her drink bleach.

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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Knock Knock whose there? ach ach who? bless you

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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