- Anti Joke

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

Yo mama so fat, her whole family is encouraging her to exercise and go on a diet.

Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

see ya

Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

Two gays walk into a bar, they are then kicked out by the homophobic owner.

your momma's so stupid she shot herself

Why did the

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

Why are Asians good at math? Because coincidentally many are interested in it and study a lot.

Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Q: Whats worse than a dead baby in a bag? A: Please just make my hamburger.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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