Quick ladies take off all your clothes the cloth stealer is coming Oh yyyaaaa

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

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A woman went in the kitchen and made you a sandwich.

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4-4-2

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Knock knock What?

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

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Redneck girls. Now there's a joke.

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why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

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Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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What the difference between Adolf Hitler and Michael Phelps? Micheal Phelps can finish a race.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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