- Anti Joke

There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

DRRRRIN Finally someone uses the doorbell.

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

heads up!

Hi

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

25

What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

DRRRRIN Finally someone uses the doorbell.

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

whats brown and sticky? shit

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

heads up!

Hi

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

25

What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

whats brown and sticky? shit

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

DRRRRIN Finally someone uses the doorbell.