Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

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What's black and white and black and white and black and white? A chessboard.

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What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

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what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Shut the cork up!

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You tell him to do so.

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What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops