What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

What happen when you put a Ciara and a Charlie together? They have sex.

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

Wy did the man fall? A tree fell on his legs!

Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

When im invisible you cant see me, i know

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A bat.

Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

knock knock who's there a tiger Alex proceeds to walk away as there is a tiger at his front door. he then calls the police because of the potential danger. the animal control then apprehends the animal and takes it to an enclosure

Why couldn't the mexican get a job? He was seven.

What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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