Why was the man reading various news articles on the Internet at 2:21 in the morning? Because at that time he could not sleep. Which meant he tried to find something else to fill his time up with.

A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

what's the difference between a dog and a sheep? one's a dog and the other isn't.

how do you make time fly? throw a clock out a window.

Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

I like it in the butt. - Tyler James Nehring. Call me if you want to give me the d. 863-670-1547

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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