What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

Whats black and hangs from trees in my backyard? blackberries..

my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

How do you make sushi if you are a fish? Commit suicide and sell yourelf to a sushi resturant!

Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had died.

Penis

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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