There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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What is the best kind of necro? Dead necro.

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fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

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A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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Whats Black and White and Red all over ? A Zebra laying in a pool of its own blood.

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

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How old are you like 10? Im 11 so shut the fuck up

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A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

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Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

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How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

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Why did I write this anti-joke? Because I am generally not that funny.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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