What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

What is 1+1? It's 2!

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

9

Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

Q) What's worse than getting dumped by text? A) Getting hit by a fridge.

Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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