Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

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What did the Chinaman say to the other Chinaman? I dont know, he was speaking in Chinese.

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What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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why did the ginger get made fun of? because he had red hair

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your mother is so fat that she eats a lot of high fat foods.

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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why did the women have to black eyes? obviously because her husband hit her because he wanted a sandwich and he slapped the bitch and told her to get in the kitchen!

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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A duck walks into a bar. He sees Khloe Kardashian sitting on a barstool. The duck runs out of the bar screaming.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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what do you call a dead arab? a suicide bomber

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What is 8===D- ? A jew with a lip piercing.

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what's worse than getting beaten by police? Getting beaten by Russian police

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-646-2835 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names travis

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A whale's vagina

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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How do you get a boy out of bed, you cut off his fingers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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