When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

Bob fell off his roof.

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

Why did the moron jump through the window?

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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