What's fat and ginger? My dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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What is the difference between baldness and boldness? The second letter.

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Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

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Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? The black guy is a sentient human being, and the bucket of shit is just a metal container filled with feces

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? - Getting killed in the Holocaust. Whats worse than that? - Nothing.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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Roses are red violets are blue you have cancer......

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What did your mom say when Quinn Griffith Randel walked in the door? Hi.

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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Call of Duty is Awesome So is fingering a dead lion with an iron dildo

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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I got shot once it hurt a lot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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