- Anti Joke

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

That's what she didn't say

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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