When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Kuo-n7Du0

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

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Q: Why couldnt the kid feel his legs A: He had no arms

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GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

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What did the blind man say to the bartender? Nothing, I forgot to mention he's also mute and has no legs.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

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How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

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Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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One watermelon said the the other watermelon, "you are looking mighty plump today", the other watermelon didn't say anything because watermelons cant talk

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once upon a time there was a boy

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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