A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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What's black and red all over? Half a cat

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Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

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whats brown and sticky? shit

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Why did the bones cross the road? They didn't, the dogs ate them.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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poop is very very yummy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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