Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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Why did the Jew have very bad gas? He had very rough anal sex and air got stuck up his bum

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Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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*spongebob voice* 25

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Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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