Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

whats 69+2? 71

Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

today a nazi canadian killed himself the world is now a better place

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

Which is longer? A rope...

Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

What's black, white and red all over? Nothing, I'm colourblind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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