What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

The BCS

A horse walks into a barn.

general tso's broccoli

why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

A: What happened to the snake? B: It died

Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

A white person at Harvard

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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