a potato flew around my room

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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knock knock Come in!!!

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WNBA

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

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I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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