What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

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When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

69 :)

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me Ben. You just told me to come over. We are going jogging aren' we? Oh ya, sorry. I forgot the time. Is it cold out? Ya, it is pretty cold. You should bring a jacket. Ok, let me go get my jacket. Alright, can u grab me a water please? Ya sure. Thankyou.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

How do you hold someone in suspense?

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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