A random guy walks into your house and says hi. You say SHUTUP

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A blind man walks into a pole.

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How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

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Q: What's the difference between lucky charms and a baby? A: One is magically delicious and the other is a breakfast serial.

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A women in her kitchen hears a thud outside. Her husband fell off the roof.

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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nipple

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

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How much fun does a gay guy have? A butt load.

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knock knock who is there? Jehovah's Witness... IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door. Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you. In most ways Jehovah's Witnesses are like everyone else. They have normal problems—economic, physical, emotional. They make mistakes at times, for they are not perfect, inspired, or infallible. But they try to learn from their experiences and diligently study the Bible to make needed corrections. They have made a dedication to God to do his will, and they apply themselves to fulfill this dedication. In all their activities they seek guidance from God's Word and his holy spirit.

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A blond, brunette, and red head jump off a building. Who hit the ground last? The red head because she was last to jump.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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