Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

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Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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Why did the Chinese man have a cat in his oven? Because his wife had decided to divorce him that day so he threw he in the oven, and the cat happened to be in her arms at the time.

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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Roses are red, violetes are blue, Your monkey sucks.

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24

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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A guy walks into a bar what does he say? OW.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. somebody recognizes him and immidiately asks for his autograph

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Sac

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Q: What do you call a black guy with an air plane? A: A pilot you racist bastard!

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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