Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

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it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

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Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops