Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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if quiz is quizzal whats test?

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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What did the sign say at Disney World? Disney World.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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... i forgot the joke :p

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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Why did the chicken refuse to cross the road? Yo dawg, dat chicken saw dat hoe Sally crossin da road, dat biatch got hit wit a fridge. Dat chicken was like "hell naw, yall must be trippin, i aint finna die over dat shiet homie, peace!"

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how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they want to. This is a free country, where people are free to travel as the please, no matter what their sexual orientation may be

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my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

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Q: What did the man ask the waiter when he was seated at Cracker Barrel? A: May I please have more golf tees?

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Grammer is very important

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Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

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What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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