Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

What time is it when you should go to the dentist? About ten minutes before whatever happens to be the time of your appointment.

I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

Wanna know something funny? Your face

I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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