How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

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Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

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Why did the elephants get in a taxi? They were going to the airport.

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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Why did the man get a haircut? Because he had long hair.

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

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What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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poop

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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What did hitler say to the bartender? Nothing he's dead.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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