when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

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What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

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What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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whats black and white? a zebra

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the love boat

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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One time I masturbated by myself

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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Another cat joke. You gotta be kitten me.

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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