A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

What is black, often hung by a rope on a tree, and something white people like to play with? A tire swing.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

nipple

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

What has wheels and flies? A wheel that I have altered so it can fly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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