A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

Why do those Indian people have that dot on their forehead ? Idk but it makes a good target.

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

WNBA

How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

Where did Little Billy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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