Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

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A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

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why did the ginger get made fun of? because he had red hair

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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Why does Santa Clause not have children? Because he only "comes" once a year

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A man buys a prius

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The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

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Knock knock Who's there? Micheal Jordan. Micheal Jordan who? Your an idiot

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause kade touches himself at night

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Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

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What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

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"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

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What happens when you mix a black guy and a chinese guy. A disfigured man

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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why didn't the blond laugh at the anti-joke? because, she was aborted in her mom's third trimester

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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