Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

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How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

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chuck norris

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A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

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What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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