Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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