What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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No

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Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops