Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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try to find the 1 thumbs up if you find it! 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thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops