It's funny that Melo and Garnett are going to be on the same Allstar team

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Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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Whats sad about a city bus full of black people exploding. NOTHING

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Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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A white female funded a strong relationship with an african american male. One year later the white female was driving to work and had to slam on the breaks to stop a potention crash.

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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