Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

add me on facebook guys , im sexy , i get mad girls and guys, im bisexual , and im a blood (the gang) http://www.facebook.com/brock.beatty.1?ref=ts

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

Stop. Seriously stop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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