Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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what do u call a black men standing on top of a church. holy shit

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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Male leadership.

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what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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can you touch your toes? no

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

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what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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