I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

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Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

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Yo Momma So Fat!

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A man walks into a bar and orders a sprite. Everyone in the bar looks and him funny and then laughs. He then tells them, "I would rather satisfy myself with a cool lemon-lime drink than put the poisonous toxins of alchohol into my blood stream."

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

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Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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12

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

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George Bush.

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Why was the man whistling? He was calling his friend.

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Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops