Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Why couldn't the black guy vote? He was only 17.

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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What’s the best part about knowing things no one else does? Nothing. I’m schizophrenic and can’t afford medication.

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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Where's the dick??? east

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

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How would you rule?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

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How do you kill a dead baby? You can't, it's already dead.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

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Q: Why was the black man good at basketball? A: because he practiced

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops