How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

When is a door not a door? Never.

A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

God. God.

Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

banana

Why did the young teenager cut class? To cut himself! Get it?! Its a pun!

Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

why did Sarah fall out of the swing? she had no arms. Knock knock. who's there? not Sarah.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

Hi my name is Lisa Hi Lisa my name is Karen. Nice to meet Karen Likewise...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...