Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

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Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

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a woman leaves the kitchen.......

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

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You and your parents are going to die today

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Why was Jessica sad? She had just recently run over a few newborn puppies with her car.

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Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

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what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

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Where did Little Sally go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

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A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

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"Knock Knock," "Whos There?" "The Pizza Guy" "I hate pizza."

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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