What did the bat say to the human? Nothing because bats make too high of frequency noises for humans to understand

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Q:What's the difference between a turtle and a cat? A: One's a turtle and the other is a cat....

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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How do you know when your dog is gay? When the dog starts wearing way to many Deep Vs and watches the Oxygen channel with "friends"

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What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

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What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs go for christmas? Cancer

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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What's the anonymous name for vampire hunters? The KKK.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

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there once was a time before bonerss it sucked it sucked real bad like that kid who never washes his gym closes bad Mason Manning JLR

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I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

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Justin's humor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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