Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

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Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

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What did the big pickle say to the little pickle? "I'm black."

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what do you call a attractive blond haired girl who sings songs. pixie lott

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and his problem is destroying his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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